While at the DMV the other day getting my car registered, I overhead the following conversation:
Dude: Yeah so I lost my license and I know I need to show proof of who I am to get a new one.
DMV: It’s easy sir, did you bring a birth certificate or social security card.
Dude: No, I don’t know where those are. But I do have my fishing license, Sam’s Club card, and my ATM card.
DMV: How about a passport?
Dude: I don’t have one of those either. I think I have my blockbuster card with me…
DMV: Well, we kind of need official documents sir…
It broke my heart to see that we don’t recognize Sam’s Club and Blockbuster for official identity verification.
This got me thinking though, what happens if I lose all my various forms of official identification? What would I have to identify me?
My license for being a hug therapist- In high school I went to a one day convention for students to help other students. It was how to do peer counseling and things of that nature. Basically I signed up for it to get out of school for the day because I mean really… would come come to me when you are in crisis for advice?
While there we took a class on hug therapy and how the human touch can mean so much to someone in need. At the end of the class we all got blank certificates that were pre-signed stating that we are hug therapists. I still have mine to this day and debate if I should put it on my resume as a professional license.
My collection of name badges from crappy retail jobs- I still have name badges for when I was 16 and working in a supermarket. For some reason I have kept every single name badge I have had for every crappy retail job I worked. There is no reason for me to have them anymore, but I guess if I lose my id I can throw all of them on my shirt and consider them multiple forms of identification. Well except for the fake one I made when I worked at “Going to the Game” that has my name as “Jockamo”…
All my various Supermarket cards- I have lived in multiple cities and states, for some reason I have kept all my supermarket cards from the various supermarkets in the area. For awhile in my wallet I had seven cards, for what reason I still don’t know. Maybe I will be in Albany again one day, needing to buy something that is on special, I can whip out that card and save forty cents…. sweet.
What worthless forms of identification do you have?