I love going into Staples. (Not because I worked there while in college and had a Christmas party threesome.) There isn’t a store on the face of the earth that has as much random bullshit mixed with every day items that you actually need.
The other day I had to go use their fax machine to send a copy of a document when I noticed some of the various products that they had for sale. A massage type device, a Starbucks gift set, and some sort of body wash all were up towards the front of the store on massive displays reminding the person buying file folders to get a crappy gift for the companies secret Santa game. I get the whole reason why they are there, impulse items for the overburdened Christmas shopper but the combinations and random product placement throughout the store cracks me up.
Honestly I think that the people that lay out the stores in the corporate headquarters just get totally stoned and craft ideas. Here is how I think a sample meeting would go:
Steve: Time to layout the store for Christmas again. What combinations do you guys have this year?
Dave: Gummy bears and push pins.
Steve: Totally a natural idea. I can see what you are doing with that.
Jim: KY Jelly and staplers.
Steve: Inspired…. Nothing makes you think of KY more than putting a fastening device into paper.
Dave: A giant tub of pretzels and Elmer’s Glue.
Steve: Good call.
Jim: Post it notes and pencils.
Steve: Are you insane man? That doesn’t make any sense whatsoever.
Dave: How about post it notes and rectal thermometers?
Steve: Way to save the day Dave… way to save the day.
Now I am going to head over to Staples to pick up a pack of Bic pens, some pork chops, a new chair, and the new Batman movie.
What is some of the oddest combinations you have seen in a store? What stores make you say things like WTF, LOL, OMG, or other random internet slang?